This week was the final official week of term, and the last one of these on St. Matthias campus. Although I will live in the library until my exams, this marks the end of an era, and my three years have gone far too quickly. Well, if I manage to graduate. This reality-check combined with (what I call) ‘Dissertation-side-effects’ has left me inappropriately emotional, and the only person around currently is the library security guard. He is not my friend as of yet. I have spent the entire week flitting between three different campuses, and tying up loose ends in the form of meetings. After no less than six this week, it appears I have run out of shirts. My boyfriend released a new album without telling me; Scream (Funk my Life Up) by Paolo Nutini has quite literally been on repeat since Monday. In other news, I completed my final presentation, or ‘garbled’, as I was told (too many late-night library sessions). I celebrated the garble with a ‘Girls Night Out’ and I regret nothing. Alongside Graduation-panic this week (it will cost an arm and a leg or maybe a whole body), several chaotic occurrences led me to wonder: are we rushing life?
‘We have no time to stand and stare’. This was featured on an advert I remember watching when I was growing-up. I always thought the message was exaggerated, and adults could make time really. Just one of the many things I’ve been wrong about. Having sat in several traffic jams this week on the verge of tears due to time pressures (and caffeine-induced future/money/dissertation-related stress), I found myself realizing just how impatient the world is. I wasn’t alone in demonstrating symptoms; several drivers were beeping, scowling and making hand gestures. In deciding last weekend that it is important to do what is right however difficult; I need to learn to say no sometimes, if only to avoid potential car accidents. Is patience a virtue? With the pressure put on us in our modern lives to ‘have it all’, it is surprising that we are not having heart-attacks instead. Keeping up with a 24-hour day is exhausting, and it no longer stops when we hit the sheets. IPhones, laptops and televisions ensure we are constantly ‘on’ and a lack of focus is the result. With so many things demanding our attention, what are we to-do? To-do lists are helpful, but ticking them off can become an extra pressure. Productivity is the new buzz-word, and they want it now. When all good things come to those who don’t wait, the clock is always ticking. Just don’t press snooze.
Next week may be just as emotional due to the impending bittersweet end of university. Whilst I am excited, I am also gutted to be leaving. Hugs, back-massages and Made in Chelsea are completely essential in the current third-year climate; if only to stop/accompany eating copious amounts of food. The Dissertation has made me eat things I don’t even like. After a week of solid reading, including 120 pages of 18th century love-letters, I was strangely inclined to write to two famous authors to ask for promotion/funding for my Creative Writing MFA. Obviously, they did not respond. My donations page has received a grand total of zero donations due to the fact that I don’t have the cure for cancer. With funding searches inducing a regular 4-hour sleeping pattern, I realized things are beginning to get a little tricky. I decided that I must/can/will do this during my excuse of a run around Clifton, and I have since come up with a new idea. I wrote an exciting piece of writing this morning, and with all my organs still intact I remain hopeful. Well, I remain hopeful whilst living in perpetual darkness due to tripping a light-switch. It will not trip back.
In not wishing to bombard people once again via Facebook (I hate doing it when people are so busy) here are my links to sponsor for free (just voting by e-mail address) or feel free to share my donations page in the hope that a business somewhere will like the look of it:
https://www.gotchosen.com/en/scholarship/sponsor/Ericatoms (The one I managed to get 122 sponsors for is revealed in May, but they have since asked for all sponsors again for a separate competition)
http://www.gofundme.com/81c6g8 (embarrassing but I must try everything)