Western Eye's guide to all you need to know to keep happy and healthy on the festival circut...
Need a wash?
Baby wipes, baby wipes, baby wipes. Boots and Superdrug do their own brand for a quid or two and you’ll only need a packet. Not only do they clean your face (when it’s covered in UV paint), you’ll be able to have a general take on a shower with these bad boys – they’ll even be gentle on your special places. Lord knows that’ll need a scrub. And boys, don’t be embarrassed to buy ‘no more tears’ we wouldn’t want your John Thomas to get upset.
Flip flops? Not great for mud…
The sun’s shining the weekend of your festival? Great! Yes, this is great but you can never, ever, ever trust Britain’s weather. It may love you at times but it can also be a cruel hearted bugger. So, instead take some pumps/trainers and a good sturdy pair of wellies. Who cares if you don’t end up wearing them? If it does end up raining, you’ll be the one laughing at all the open-toed fools.
Airbed? Nah...
There is a myth that you must own the finest of equipment to have a great time. Well, I’ve got news for you – you don’t. Fed up with the prices of airbeds, camp beds etc, I decided to invest in a lilo from Wilkinsons – priced £1. It only took a couple of minutes to blow up and fitted the exact size of my sleeping bag – having a raised bit for your head enables your very own plastic pillow. Viola!
Cover your soldier
Now kids, just because it’s a festival doesn’t mean you can go giving it out to anything with a pulse. Sadly, STI’s still exist at a festival; probably more so due to the drinks, drugs and err, rock and roll. So do yourselves a favour and take lots of condoms – it doesn’t matter if you don’t get lucky, your mate might. The same goes for you girls, just because you don’t have one doesn’t mean it doesn’t need to be covered up. Get a helmet on that soldier!
Your bum won’t wipe itself!
Now, I know most of you will have grasped the concept of toilet roll but you wouldn’t believe how many people forget it to festivals! Take one, heck take one for each day! Who knows how many of your mates will have forgot the white stuff. Furthermore, if you do run out or don’t bring any, those b***ards down the shop will charge you a fiver a roll. Do what’s best, look after your bum.
Treat yourself right
Last year at Glastonbury I managed to give myself alcohol/food/general poisoning. It was the worst thing I’ve had to experience. So, common sense – drink plenty of water during the day; wear sunscreen/sit in the shade occasionally; eat enough fruit and veg to get you through the day and finally, don’t drink too much. I’m no killjoy here, just don’t drink your body weight in ASDA’s own dark rum; I am speaking from experience after all.
